Is Sex Not The Same After Baby? What Are Your Options?

Posted on: 15 September 2016

Although many couples find themselves facing a natural and understandable decrease in the frequency of their sexual encounters after having children, in some cases, the sex itself may simply not feel the same. If you're dealing with a loss of sensation or tautness after giving birth or had a difficult recovery from an episiotomy or vaginal tear and are still dealing with periodic pain, you may wonder whether there's anything you can do to restore your previous anatomy — and sex life. Fortunately, cosmetic gynecologists now have a number of ways to treat excess skin, weakened vaginal walls, and other birth-related gynecological issues that could be interfering with your sex life. Read on to learn more about the various types of vaginal rejuvenation procedures to determine if this would be a good option for you.

What types of cosmetic gynecology are available?

Cosmetic gynecology can take a number of forms — from enhancement or reduction of the clitoral hood to increase sensation to a labioplasty to remove excess skin that could be making you feel self-conscious. A cosmetic gynecologist can work with you to examine the specific problems you're dealing with and help you decide which (if any) procedures could bring you some relief.

A vaginoplasty focuses primarily on tightening the vaginal walls — especially those nearest the vaginal entrance — providing additional pleasure for partners during sex. Many women who have given birth vaginally opt for a vaginoplasty to reverse the effects of passing an infant through the birth canal. Other new mothers may choose a labioplasty, reducing the size of their labia majora or minora to decrease unpleasant friction, avoid embarrassment in tight pants, or improve self-confidence.

What should you consider before seeking vaginal rejuvenation? 

Although these procedures have helped many women regain their sense of desire toward a partner and the pleasure of sex, they can be invasive — so it's important to do as much prep work as possible to ensure surgery is truly the only way to restore your vagina to its pre-children tone and condition. 

First, you'll want to evaluate the root cause of your sexual issues. If you feel you need a vaginoplasty to tighten your vagina but never perform Kegel exercises or do anything else to tone your vaginal walls, your surgery may eventually fail as you neglect to gain or maintain muscle tone. Those who are breastfeeding may still be dealing with hormonal shifts that can affect sex drive and lubrication — often, these problems will resolve themselves after weaning.

You'll also want to consider whether you plan on more children. It usually makes little sense to have surgery performed only to give birth again a year or two later — on the other hand, if your condition has caused your sex life to come to a screeching halt, it may still be money well spent even if you later require a follow-up procedure.